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A shipwrecked Scotsman Warning: This joke has been classified by DeepLake Entertainment as a "rude" joke. It may contain foul language, sexual references or other obscene content. We consider these jokes suitable for adults only. If you're not an adult and read the joke anyway, please don't blame us if you get offended. Thanks, -The DeepLake Editorial Team. A shipwrecked Scotsman finally washed ashore on a small island. As he regained consciousness on the beach, he noticed a beautiful, unclad nymphet standing over him. "Would you like some food?" she asked. The Scot hoarsely croaks, "Och, lassie, I havna' ittin a bite in a week noo and I am verra hungry!" She disappeared into the woods and quickly came back with a heaping helping of haggis. "Would you like something to drink?" she asked. "Och, aye! That haggis has made me verra hungry and I wad verra much like a drink!" She disappeared into the woods again and returned Sometime later with a bottle of 75-year-old single-malt Scotch whiskey. The Scotsman was beginning to think that he was in heaven! Then, the unclad nymphet leaned towards him and said"Would you like to play around?" "Och, lassie, don't tell me ye've got a golf course here too!" More similar jokes: 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 (Previous / Next) Cheap international phone calls from either the USA or UK. Excellent rates. Using the service supports this web site! USA Cheap International Calls | UK Cheap International Calls Get a new ringtone for your phone (UK only). Visit GetRingtonesNow.com for over 3,000 polyphonic and monophonic ringtones. Easy and fast ordering, full customer care.